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JOHN MCCLANE AND KITTENS
For Ally. <3 We truly are Secret Twins. It is even secret from us! INDEED.
***
"Hey, I'm back," Matt called out, locking the front door behind himself (because if nothing else, you could count on a McClane to be paranoid). "I brought you some Heineken so you can wash down my Red Bull after you steal it."
Silence. Matt held still, a sudden burst of adrenaline closing his throat. Shit, John's car was in the driveway, that meant he was either asleep (unconscious, he tried not to think) or out on a run (kidnapped, he really didn't think, because seriously, kidnapping John? Matt would be the first guy buying popcorn to see that), it didn't have to mean anything ominous. But that didn't rule out anything ominous either, so he moved as quietly as he could, trying to see everywhere at once, creeping past the sofa-
The sofa where John was sleeping. Jesus. Matt couldn't help a little choked laugh at his own expense, reaching out to touch John's shoe propped up on the arm of the sofa. Way to be more paranoid than a McClane, Farrell. But then again, was that... was that a Tribble on John's chest?
The Tribble twitched an ear. A remarkably tiny, adorable ear. And then yawned a pointy, tiny, adorable yawn. With a squeak at the end like it had surprised itself. The Tribble (kitten) stretched out a leg, spreading all its toes, and left its paw on John's sleeping face.
"I am going to die of cute," Matt said. He hadn't really meant to say it out loud, but John snorted softly and then squinted at him in a way that was almost as adorable as the kitten, although maybe grumpier.
"Just until tomorrow," John muttered, not even moving the kitten's paw to talk. "The pound was closed."
"Ah," Matt said, coming around to touch the kitten's unspeakably soft fur, "it all becomes clear now. Don't worry, I won't revoke your Man Card."
"Don't even," John muttered, and he must have been awfully tired after all because his eyes shut again and it was like he hadn't even woken up. Matt grinned and thought idly about a cat running around in this great big house, taking up a little of the empty space. John would probably-
"...John. Is that another kitten under your elbow?"
***
"Hey, I'm back," Matt called out, locking the front door behind himself (because if nothing else, you could count on a McClane to be paranoid). "I brought you some Heineken so you can wash down my Red Bull after you steal it."
Silence. Matt held still, a sudden burst of adrenaline closing his throat. Shit, John's car was in the driveway, that meant he was either asleep (unconscious, he tried not to think) or out on a run (kidnapped, he really didn't think, because seriously, kidnapping John? Matt would be the first guy buying popcorn to see that), it didn't have to mean anything ominous. But that didn't rule out anything ominous either, so he moved as quietly as he could, trying to see everywhere at once, creeping past the sofa-
The sofa where John was sleeping. Jesus. Matt couldn't help a little choked laugh at his own expense, reaching out to touch John's shoe propped up on the arm of the sofa. Way to be more paranoid than a McClane, Farrell. But then again, was that... was that a Tribble on John's chest?
The Tribble twitched an ear. A remarkably tiny, adorable ear. And then yawned a pointy, tiny, adorable yawn. With a squeak at the end like it had surprised itself. The Tribble (kitten) stretched out a leg, spreading all its toes, and left its paw on John's sleeping face.
"I am going to die of cute," Matt said. He hadn't really meant to say it out loud, but John snorted softly and then squinted at him in a way that was almost as adorable as the kitten, although maybe grumpier.
"Just until tomorrow," John muttered, not even moving the kitten's paw to talk. "The pound was closed."
"Ah," Matt said, coming around to touch the kitten's unspeakably soft fur, "it all becomes clear now. Don't worry, I won't revoke your Man Card."
"Don't even," John muttered, and he must have been awfully tired after all because his eyes shut again and it was like he hadn't even woken up. Matt grinned and thought idly about a cat running around in this great big house, taking up a little of the empty space. John would probably-
"...John. Is that another kitten under your elbow?"