FF7 fic: Perpetuity
Jan. 18th, 2006 02:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
swordageTitle: Perpetuity
Series: FF7
Rating: G
Summary: Second part of the Eternity arc. (Also, it's the January thaw and thus dark and dismal and rainy. I have issues with rain.)
1. Continuum 2. Perpetuity 3. Ubiquity 4. Evermore
The rain was soft on the roof, a heavy drop that had built up stories above Seventh Heaven falling like a rock every few minutes. Kadaj listened to his own breathing, trying not to sleep. His brothers were wrapped tight around him, and Cloud was a warm sleepy presence in the other room, but there was the other. The other that gave Kadaj dreams not of his own making.
The rain lulled him slowly but surely, so he had no choice but to slide from between his brothers and stalk down the hall. No one was awake; he could hear the chorus of child-snores from the end of the hall, the firm silence of Tifa's rest, the painfully loud ruckus from the guest room Cid stayed in. Kadaj squared his bare shoulders and stood in the doorway to the last room, not entirely sure he dared go in.
"Kadaj," Cloud acknowledged quietly from the shadows. Automatically, he stepped forward; just as quickly he took a step back. "No, come here. I think you need to see him, Kadaj."
"No," Kadaj said firmly. "I can hear him just fine from here."
"Kadaj," Cloud said again. Kadaj looked away, toward the window streaked with wet. The light was rippling over the bed he didn't dare look at. Cloud sighed, stood from his chair and moved toward Kadaj.
"No," he repeated weakly, letting Cloud take his hand. "No," as he was pulled gently toward the bed. "No. No. No."
"Kadaj," Cloud murmured. "Kadaj. Look at him."
He looked.
The rain-warped city lights fluttered over the loose braid of pale hair flung carelessly across the pillow. Sephiroth's eyes were closed, his face gaunt and unhealthy. His hands lay on the blankets, cold and lonely; his breathing was shallow and irregular. Kadaj found his own matching it.
"No," Cloud said sharply, giving him a shake until he gasped. "Kadaj, no. You are not him. You can never be him, because first you are you. Kadaj."
"Oh god," Kadaj said weakly, feeling his knees buckle. He began to laugh quietly, mindful of the children. "What am I doing. What am I. Oh god."
He buried his face against the side of the bed to muffle the mad laughter he could feel bubbling up inside his chest. It was too much, they'd asked too much. There was nowhere to run from himself, from what was inside him. This was it, his brain was going to split right in two and there was no room for Kadaj in Kadaj's head -
A hand touched his hair, and everything went still. The shrill sound of his thoughts was quiet; the rain pattered against the roof, ting tap tip, and Cloud breathed anxiously next to him, and Sephiroth was awake and listening, worried and relieved all at once because yes, this was his child, the child born from his cells in a dish, the child he never held, and Kadaj jerked his head up and stared at Sephiroth's still, tired face. The slender hand fell from his hair at the motion, thumping limply against the blankets. He took a deep breath, a shaky breath, and looked up at Cloud.
"We'll be alright," Kadaj said softly. "We'll both be alright."
"Good," Cloud said simply.
Next
Series: FF7
Rating: G
Summary: Second part of the Eternity arc. (Also, it's the January thaw and thus dark and dismal and rainy. I have issues with rain.)
1. Continuum 2. Perpetuity 3. Ubiquity 4. Evermore
The rain was soft on the roof, a heavy drop that had built up stories above Seventh Heaven falling like a rock every few minutes. Kadaj listened to his own breathing, trying not to sleep. His brothers were wrapped tight around him, and Cloud was a warm sleepy presence in the other room, but there was the other. The other that gave Kadaj dreams not of his own making.
The rain lulled him slowly but surely, so he had no choice but to slide from between his brothers and stalk down the hall. No one was awake; he could hear the chorus of child-snores from the end of the hall, the firm silence of Tifa's rest, the painfully loud ruckus from the guest room Cid stayed in. Kadaj squared his bare shoulders and stood in the doorway to the last room, not entirely sure he dared go in.
"Kadaj," Cloud acknowledged quietly from the shadows. Automatically, he stepped forward; just as quickly he took a step back. "No, come here. I think you need to see him, Kadaj."
"No," Kadaj said firmly. "I can hear him just fine from here."
"Kadaj," Cloud said again. Kadaj looked away, toward the window streaked with wet. The light was rippling over the bed he didn't dare look at. Cloud sighed, stood from his chair and moved toward Kadaj.
"No," he repeated weakly, letting Cloud take his hand. "No," as he was pulled gently toward the bed. "No. No. No."
"Kadaj," Cloud murmured. "Kadaj. Look at him."
He looked.
The rain-warped city lights fluttered over the loose braid of pale hair flung carelessly across the pillow. Sephiroth's eyes were closed, his face gaunt and unhealthy. His hands lay on the blankets, cold and lonely; his breathing was shallow and irregular. Kadaj found his own matching it.
"No," Cloud said sharply, giving him a shake until he gasped. "Kadaj, no. You are not him. You can never be him, because first you are you. Kadaj."
"Oh god," Kadaj said weakly, feeling his knees buckle. He began to laugh quietly, mindful of the children. "What am I doing. What am I. Oh god."
He buried his face against the side of the bed to muffle the mad laughter he could feel bubbling up inside his chest. It was too much, they'd asked too much. There was nowhere to run from himself, from what was inside him. This was it, his brain was going to split right in two and there was no room for Kadaj in Kadaj's head -
A hand touched his hair, and everything went still. The shrill sound of his thoughts was quiet; the rain pattered against the roof, ting tap tip, and Cloud breathed anxiously next to him, and Sephiroth was awake and listening, worried and relieved all at once because yes, this was his child, the child born from his cells in a dish, the child he never held, and Kadaj jerked his head up and stared at Sephiroth's still, tired face. The slender hand fell from his hair at the motion, thumping limply against the blankets. He took a deep breath, a shaky breath, and looked up at Cloud.
"We'll be alright," Kadaj said softly. "We'll both be alright."
"Good," Cloud said simply.
Next