Life is not a paragraph

So I was poking through my personal journal looking for something and I found this ficlet. I have no idea why I never posted it here. I was probably thinking BUT IT'S SO UNPOLISHED HOMG but I have relaxed a bit since then, I hope. XD Anyway, the chatlog leading up to it pretty much says it all:

Lex: You know, just for fun, I want companion!Prowl.
Spacehussy: ooooooooh
Lex: It is, after all, entirely logical that the crew would need stress relief, and interfacing has the benefit of producing closer bonds as well as using up wild energy.
Spacehussy: mmmmmmmmmmmm yes that is in fact quite logical >:3
Lex: And he's just nuts enough that he'd observe to see who needs it and then approach them himself
Spacehussy: mmmmmm okay I like that a lot.
Lex: yessss. It might even take them a while to figure it out - they'd have to suffer through a couple random, head-spinning interfaces first. :3
Spacehussy: POOR DEARS
Lex: hee hee hee

( OH NOES ROBOT SLASH )

I have no idea how many years ago I started this. A lot. About five, I think? I've poked at it off and on for most of that time. It's... Well. You can tell. The first half actually got posted as its own story, but since I just kinda kept writing, I'll repost the whole thing here. It'll always have a special fond place in my heart - and in hindsight, it was pretty clearly my thing for nonhumans popping up. Huh. Also this is so, so AU. Let's see, can I add any more caveats that will make people want to avoid it like the plague...? XD I do like it though. I want other people to like it, deep down under its outer layers of shitty writing and worse plotting. I want to sit by the waterfall and croak with the bullfrogs, you know? Yeah. Anyway. SO NOSTALGIC~

WIP: Naruto, Gaara/Sasuke/Naruto (nonsexual)
Working title: Monsters

( This is over 6000 words. Whoa. )

Title: I've come to be untroubled in my seeking
Series: Transformers G1-ish
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 2276
Notes: I have so many other things I should be writing. Instead, this got finished! I've been reading too many "Starscream is just damaged and fixing him makes everything better" fics, clearly. Guess what happens in this story.
Sample: "Did you think to hold it over me? Megatron will feel no gratitude to you, either. Or perhaps you foolishly hoped to impart a voice of reason to the Decepticon ranks?" Starscream laughed. "If Soundwave and Shockwave could not do such a thing, then it cannot be done."

( "It was a matter of morality, not power. I would be a fool to think you indebted for it." )

Title:
Series: Stargate Atlantis
Rating: PG-13
Stats: 2080 words in 3 hours, no beta
Summary: I got an icon. spacehussy got an SGA-only blog. I wrote lots of porn in the comments, which made me want to write more, which made me think of the icon that kinda looks like Sheppard, and there was a story. It involved Genii and horses and a margarita, although the latter was more on the author's part than the characters'.

John and Genii -centric. Ah, crazy Amish Nazis.

( Blame it on the icon. )

Title: Coin's Mettle
Series: Fullmetal Alchemist
Rating: PG-13/R
Summary: A wrong turn can lead to adventure. A cat can most certainly lead a military maneuver. I do believe this is the most plot I have ever written, and also I have forgotten how to write transitions. This is for celes_grant.

( The knock at the door was unexpected and thus unwelcome. )

1. Catnip
2. Feline
3. Coin's Mettle

Title: Messed Up
Series: Naruto
Rating: PG-13
Notes: For kytyngurl2. Present tense, with my apologies.
Request: SasuNaru. Comparisons of their childhood and past. Understanding. Slightly fluffy!angsty

( No such thing as starting over. )

***

Title: Sharp as Steel
Series: FMA
Rating: PG-13
Notes: For ponderosa121. First-person present tense (oh my god I am so sorry).
Request: Unabashed evilness; Ishvar-era death, destruction, and mayhem. "Knives out."

( The soldiers are starting to get anxious. )

This was going to go up at the same time as Desert Unwell, but then I fell asleep and rewrote the end. Not at the same time.

Title: War Is A Fantasy
Series: FMA
Rating: PG-13
Ramifications: Ishbal, fourth and last in the Desert series. Because pinstripesuit actually asked for during-Ishbal, not post-Ishbal. Silly me.
Summary: Roy dreams, and then he doesn't.

( No, I didn't write this on Nyquil. )

Title: The Least Best Thing
Series: FMA
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Roy is normal. Really. Post-Ishbal.
( The tracks waver to nothingness in the heat. )

Title: Swallowing Glass
Series: Fullmetal Alchemist
Rating: PG-13
Ramifications: Post-series, assuming Ed makes his way back. Angst warning.
Summary: The mission in East City had more long-term effects than expected.

( Even heroes have the right to bleed. )

Yet more fic, arranged by fandom. Witness my obsession with Kimbley in action! Mmm, arrays.

Title: Military Man
Series: FMA
Rating: PG-13
Ramifications: AU, post-series what-if in which I selectively ignore canon. Minor spoilers for ep.51 and all the ones up to that point.
Summary: Some things, once deconstructed, can be reassembled. A man with no purpose, no friends, can make new ones.
( Parts one and two combined. )